There was a time, 15 years ago, when the San Diego Comic Con was simply one of the larger comics conventions in America.  It attracted tens of thousands, impressing each and every one, including myself.  As I entered my very first SDCC in 1995, I was a newbie to conventions, but found little difficulty in mastering the ins and outs of survival.  For all you planning your first or possibly second trip to San Diego this summer, it will not be as easy.

Comic Con has ballooned into a massive beast of a convention.  While the organizers tout 125,000 passes sold, everyone who attends knows between public sales, exhibitors, press, and industry pros that the real number is much much higher.  It can be an intimidating, yet exhilarating experience.

 To get the most out of it you must prepare, train even.  (Seriously, a few weeks of vigorous nightly walks wouldn’t hurt!)  In order to help you on your way to nerd heaven, I’ve prepared some basic tips.  To quote the Terminator, “come with me if you want to live.”

1.The Uniform

Shoes, shoes, shoes!  Personally, I get a new pair about two weeks prior so I can give them a little break in, but whatever you do, make them comfortable.  Good sandals are okay if you’re not planning on spending all day on the exhibit hall floor where your toes will be fair game.  Load up on some pop culture statements with shirts from Threadless, Jinx, or while inside the Con.  Finally, you’ll need a bag, or perhaps a “satchel.”  Whether you go back pack or courier bag, make sure it’s got plenty of room while not being too bulky.  Nothing can piss off a veteran attendee faster than a backpack that hangs two feet off its owner’s back, thwacking everyone behind them while they obliviously stare at some booth babes.  Of course, forget everything I said if you’re planning to go in costume!!

2. Food

This seems like a no brainer, but I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been stuck in Ballroom 20 with a rumbling stomach and a dry mouth.  Unless a 1o minute queue for an $8 pretzel is on your bucket list, pack some snacks and water.  Resist the Rock Star, take water!  There’s a Ralph’s grocery store nearby, hit that up every morning and you’ll be fine.  Also, eat breakfast!!  I know this convention will tire you out, but sacrifice a little sleep for some hearty eats and you will feel better all day for it.

3.  The Program

You’ll get this when you get your badge.  Read it, know it, love it.  Also, the official Comic Con website has it up right now. Highlight what you want to see and do, the prioritize them into three categories: Must, Maybe & Back-Ups.  You will not see everything. You just won’t. With the huge crowds and unpredictable lines, you can’t get from Hall H to Ballroom 20 in 10 minutes between panels.  You’ll even miss “musts,” so quell those moments of disappointment and give yourself to the ebb and flow of the Con.  And don’t forget, every morning there will be update papers available inside the convention. Look for these and grab them so you know when Richard Hatch is signing autographs. (Hint: it’s all day, every day)

4.  If You Want It, Buy It

Sure, you’ll have time to circle the floor once or twice, but so will 125,000 plus other geeks!  Know what you want and what you’ll pay for it.  Will it be at Toys R Us in a week?  Pass.  Exclusive to the Con? Grab it. See if there’s a website for the booth and ask if you can order it online if you’re unsure.  But most of all, it it is a shiny piece of happiness you desire so, get it before you can’t.  Which leads me to…

5. Budget

Be realistic!  Break it down by days for food, hotel, drinks, cabs, snacks, toys, comics, everything.  I always get sketches from my favorite artists and most will post their Con pricing on their websites, so look it up.  Exclusives, look ‘em up.  Pints at Dublin Square, look ‘em up.  And then include surprises.  A few years back there was toy of Jim Henson as a Muppet complete with banjo.  Surprise!  $30 out of my pocket I wasn’t expecting.  And you never know what small press gems you’ll discover, so factor it in as much as possible and stick to it.

6.  Talk to People!

Geeks aren’t the most socially adept species, but this is a nerd prom!  Mingle, chat, talk up the girl in the pink dreadlocks about the Umbrella Academy books in her arms!  You never know who you’ll meet and what information they may have for you.  Suddenly you’re talking to Geoff Johns’ cousin and he invites you to a DC party!  Anything can happen, friendships can be forged it you just open up and engage with the crazy mass of humanity around you.  The comics industry is one of the friendliest around, so take advantage of it!

7.  Artist’s Alley

This is by far one of the coolest parts of any Con.  Every row features some of the most talented artists working in comics today and they are practically giving away original artwork.  Even the more popular artists who charge $100 for commissions are aiding you in theft.  A high quality sketchbook (100 pound paper) is a great idea to bring and becomes a great souvenir of all your trips to Con.  If you want to pick up single pieces, grab a nice portfolio to store them safely inside.  Oh, and remember tip #5!!

8.  Panel Questions

If you want to get up and ask a question of your favorite actor, put some though into it.  Then think about it some more.  Then edit it down.  Then run it by friends and family.  And guess what, for every 100 of you, 99 aren’t funny so don’t attempt to do stand up with your question.  Also, pay attention to what other people are asking,  Every time someone repeats a question asked 10 seconds ago, God kills a kitten.

9.  Take Pictures!!!

This is the most important thing you will do at San Diego Comic Con.  There is so much to look at and so many amazing costumes etc., that your memory card should be bursting at the seams.  Keep the camera charged and at the ready at all times.  Surprises are around every corner and you must be prepared.  That is why I have a picture with Scary Spice outside Pinkbery and you don’t.  If you walk away from Con with less than 500 photos, you have failed.

10.  Use the Website

Pretty self explanatory.  Get the latest from the source!

Overall, relax and enjoy!  Comic Con is a journey not a destination.  If you miss something, chances are you’ll find something equally awesome to replace it in five minutes.  Manage your expectations and realize there are a couple thousand other nerds in the same building looking to the exact same things you are.  Have fun, and again, remember tip #5!!

(Lead image via schadenfreude.net)