Jake Pavelka, 32, and Vienna Girardi, 24, may have seemed like a match made in heaven—to those of you who live in a world where unicorns and elves exist. To the rest of us, Jake and Vienna’s romance was a time bomb waiting to happen—after all, how many relationships that are forged on The Bachelor last? Not many.

Jake’s rep confirmed the break-up to E! News on Monday, June 21. His statement said, “Jake and Vienna have split and appreciate the respect for their privacy at this time.”

Hold on—these two got together on a REALITY SHOW…I am under no obligation to respect their privacy.

The exact reasons for the break-up have not yet been released to the public. But, let’s be honest, it’s just a matter of time. These kinds of details are always “leaked” to the public.

The only thing that could make this even more of a typical Bachelor split would be if Jake calls up Tenley and tells her that he made a mistake and should have chosen her all along. (Yes, I’m referring to famous Bachelor flip-flopper Jason Mesnick.)

So, a partially-sincere “good luck” to Vienna and Jake as they go their separate ways. Jake, we’ll be seeing more of you since you’re trying to be an actor now (I know—I almost choked when I heard, too), and Vienna—I’m sure you’ll be in the tabloids soon enough.