Just when you think True Blood has about all the types of monsters they’re going to have on the show all of a sudden they throw in a minotaur just for the sheer fuck of it, and it’s awesome. They so far have vampires, maenads, shapeshifters, and this new season will apparently be chock full of werewolves. Werewolves as far as the eye can see. But there are many monsters that they haven’t introduced to the series that they totally should. Here are just a few:

1. Pinhead: Pinhead, from the popular film series Hellraiser would be the perfect addition to the show. Sookie could find the mysterious puzzle box in a glade somewhere and then accidentally unlock its terrible secrets, sending her and everyone else into an alternate dimension where pleasure and pain are interchangeable and the highest form of eroticism is mutilation.

There would be a lot more skinless corpses walking around moaning erotically and the show would need a way bigger chain budget, but it would be totally worth it to see Pinhead wax poetic to Tara about the seductive grip of pain saying something like, “In your secret heart you long to let me show you new dimensions of pain,” and have her reply, “White boy you best be gettin’ them needles outta your head cuz they be makin’ you crazy!”

2. Slimer: How much more fun would Sookie’s adventures be with a clumsy lovable ghost sidekick that gets slime everywhere? Her and Bill could be making out in the dark and she could be like, “Bill your tongue is so much bigger and slimier than it usually is,” and Bill could be like, “Sookie, I”m not making out with you, I’m in the bathroom.” And then everyone could be like, “Ohhhhh, Slimer!”

3. Mike Wazowski: Mike Mazowski, the one-eyed neurotic monster from Monsters, Inc. would add to True Blood the thing fans of the show have been clamoring for: nebbishy worrying. He could live with Bill and whenever Bill started going off about how worried he was about where Sookie was, Mike could reinforce all of Bill’s fears and add to them with his own fears and complexes.