15 of the Greatest News Personality Names Of All Time

Not all news personalities are anchormen, but if they’ve got a name worthy enough, they can live the Anchorman life for the few seconds of each day that their name is uttered. Very few news personalities have such a name, but there are enough of them to maintain the mystique we’ve grown to expect of the position. These are the 15 greatest of those names — it’s alright to be envious.

Dick Johnson

Image Source

He could be the driest man in the world, and nobody could ever say that Dick Johnson’s father didn’t have a sense of humor — there’s no “oops” when you name your kid Richard Johnson; it’s just too well-played to be coincidence. Dick never ran from his name though, as he’s taken the obvious route by not sticking to Richard.

He’s currently an anchor at NBC5 in Chicago and is actually somewhat of a prolific journalist, having covered some of biggest events of the past thirty years.

Amy Freeze

Image Source

Amy Freeze is a meteorologist for a Fox affiliate in Chicago. That’s right. A weather-woman named Amy Freeze — destiny, perhaps? Either way, it’s a damn good fit, and she’s even an Emmy award-winning journalist to top it off. While her name seems perfect for her job, she’s actually never had a drop of nicotine, alcohol or even had a cup of coffee in her entire life, so we’re going to say that her name is a bit more like her personality than anything else.

Sam Champion

Image Source

If this guy doesn’t drink everyone under the table every Friday night, then he’s wasting one hell of a good drinking name. Another weather man, Sam Champion anchors at ABC’s Good Morning America as well as ABC News.

Katty Kay

Image Source

When a guy hears a name like Katty Kay, he expects a certain type of girl to materialize and match it. That kind of girl is probably wearing some sort of cheerleader uniform, a dumb look on her face, and one hell of a reputation. That’s obviously not the case here. Ms. Kay is a long-time reporter and freelance journalist working primarily for the BBC, and as you can see, she’s not that kind of girl.

Jake Tapper

Image Source

ABC News Senior White House Correspondent Jake Tapper has one of the worst names a guy could be stuck with if he were single and looking for love these days. It’s not that it’s nerdy or grotesque in any way, just that any girl learning your name was Tapper in any sort of social setting is sure to get you anything between a blank stare and a slap to the face — just not laid. The name would fit perfectly in the porn biz, but that’s about it. Luckily, Mr. Tapper’s name didn’t cause any damage, the guy’s got a wife, two kids, and a job that makes him famous.

Shannon Hori

Image Source

We feel a great pity for Shannon Hori, because growing up in America with a last name like Hori can only mean trouble. Everyone knows that names are the first thing to be used against a kid going through school; they’re rhymed, they’re repeated, and they’re associated with the worst things possible at the worst moments possible — and whatever nicknames are generated in the process are kept for years. So, as you sit and think about how good looking this CBS news-anchor and mother of two is, just consider how hilarious her terrible nickname must have been in high school.

Dick Butkus

Image Source

Alright, so the famed Dick Butkus didn’t start out looking to be a journalist by trade, but sportscasting and cameos just come naturally to ex-linebackers with names like Dick Butkus. The guy’s got an IMDB rap sheet longer than half the actors in Hollywood, and that’s after he made it big in the first place doing what he knew best — playing football.

Al Sunshine

Image Source

Surprisingly, and somewhat disappointingly, Al Sunshine is not a weather man. He’s an investigative reporter who specializes in financial news — but he does work in Florida. All in all, we’d still call that a win for the folks in the Sunshine State who watch his show.

Harry Reasoner

Image Source

The best, most natural reaction upon hearing this man’s name is to begin giggling like a junior high school student, and then try to stop. Then you fail and start laughing openly while people in the office wonder what you just read that was so damned funny, only to realize that you’ve stumbled upon the name of a now-deceased, very famous for your parents’ generation, ground-breaking journalist by name of Harry Reasoner. Lucky for Harry, he was already preparing for retirement at about the same time that his name would have become one of the best possible monikers for a porn star’s Johnson.

Bob Ballou

Bob Ballou is the Sports Director at Austin’s KEYE-TV, and according to the official KEYE site: “Answer to your first question: Yes. Bob Ballou is his real name. He has to show his driver’s license as proof all the time.” Our guess is that Bob was likely the life of the party all throughout high school, college, and everything in between and after — with a name like Bob Ballou, how could he not be?

Joe Winters

Image Source

This guy doesn’t disappoint — yes, Joe Winters is a weather man. He’s Chief Meteorologist out at KCRG-TV9 out in Iowa of all places, and like Amy Freeze it seems he was destined for the job. There must be somebody at the Meteorological Society who sits waiting for the next one of these to come across his desk asking for accreditation. In what has to be one of driest fields of Journalism, it must be the highpoint of their year when one does.

Bryson Rash

Image Source

Bryson Rash died roughly 20 years ago, but his memory lives on as he was one of Journalism’s greats. The man was around when the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor, when the U.N. was founded, and just about everything else you can think of that happened until he retired in 1977. As for his name, it spawned tongue-in-cheek jokes in the business like “Was Bryson Rash,” and our guess is that there were about three thousand too many “that was a Rash decision” comments around the news room during his considerable tenure.

Jim Axelrod

Image Source

As a CBS News correspondent and former White House Correspondent for the same, Jim Axelrod was blessed with easily one of manliest names in show business. Keeping to his namesake, Axelrod doesn’t just wear the correspondent badge and walk around a city with a microphone, either. He is credited with being one of the first embedded news-reporters in the initial invasion of the most recent Iraq War. He was also one of the first journalists to report live while the unit he was embedded within was engaged in combat, and he was the first reporter to go live moments after US troops took what is now known as Baghdad International Airport. It’s a big name to live up to, but he’s doing a decent job of it.

Guy Junker

Image Source

Guy Junker is a Pittsburg sportscaster for ABC affiliate WTAE-4, and in his spare time he hangs out with Dick Johnson and Sam Champion at a pub where they hit on waitresses and talk about good old Harry Reasoner. Only the first part of that last sentence is true, but it would be so awesome if it all were.

Wolf Blitzer

Image Source

You may not agree with Wolf Blitzer’s politics, but you can’t deny his extensive list of credentials and years of experience in the field of Journalism, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Above all else, the most important thing of which you should take note here is this: The man’s name is Wolf Blitzer. He did not choose this name, he was born with it, in Germany, a very long time ago. It is truly the most amazing name of all News Men today. Even if you don’t like the man, you must give the name credit, because it’s due.