American Idol (8:00 p.m. EST, FOX)

I admit it, okay? I’m addicted to American Idol…at least during the preliminary auditions. This week’s auditions bring us to Chicago, where country pop star Shania Twain will be hosting…which brings me to ask: where has Shania been hiding for the past decade or so? I feel like the last time I saw her, she was dancing around in tight leopard pants and talking about feeling like a woman. Anyway, we’re still in the goofy and not-so-serious round of AI, and that’s the way I like it.

Chopped (10:00 p.m. EST, FOOD)

I can’t cook, but I love to eat.

And, oddly enough, I love watching cooking shows. Have you seen Chopped? It features four chefs who are challenged to create a dish incorporating several ingredients, which typically include an obscure factor. On tonight’s show, chicken wings are being served during the appetizer round, catfish for the main course, and a dessert that feature—what?—cherry tomatoes. Should be interesting.

Teen Mom (10:00 p.m. EST, MTV)

More and more, there are loads of teenagers getting pregnant. I’m on my way to 30, and I can’t even fathom having a child. On tonight’s episode of Teen Mom, our teenage mothers go through more trials and tribulations. Amber decides she doesn’t want to live with Gary any longer, Maci has problems in school, and Farrah wants to move out of her parents’ place. Farrah, I hear you. I hated living with my parents…but have you considered the fact that you’ll have to pay rent if you move out? Just a thought.